Hello America. It’s been a while. Don’t worry, I’ve missed you too. I decided against writing just random, bland stuff; I.E. saving the world, curing hunger, etc… So I’ll only write when I have things which I find appeasing, in hopes, of course, that you may too.
Its been a good start to the weekend. I’d planned to blog about my commencement of P90X, or my EPIC mountain bike adventure, but I must digress…
My roommate is in Paramedic training at the moment. It’s a tough gig, and there are a lot of responsibilities that go along with it.
Two days ago, he asked me if he could administer an IV drip on me. Ummm. Do you know how to do that? “Ya, of course we do it all the time” I’m assured. RED FLAG #1
I’m skeptical, but after a grueling P90X workout Friday night, I could use the extra fluid. Why not, heck I’ve seen it done a hundred times, I could probably do it myself. Not to mention I’m a team player, and willing to help out.
Okay, set me up.
I wish I had a picture. The IV drip is hanging from the Dining Room chandalier with a wire hanger. The table is messy wish books, newspaper, laptops and more.
All of his stuff is randomly scattered around. The wires and needles remind me of a drug lab on Cops. This ain’t looking too Kosher . “If this goes well, I’ll be pleasantly surprised.RED FLAG #2
— Note: When precarious situations arise and you tell yourself you’ll be surprised if it goes well, it’s a bad sign.
Then he gets me, “Where do you want the needle”… um HUH! RED FLAG #3
I’m no expert here, but I’ll attempt to transcribe.
Needle goes in: Check
–Going good so far.
The needle is in the under side of my forearm, where I have some visible veins.
As the needle slides in, some tube on the other side slides out. My heart races to reinstall pressure and it’s literally now pouring out. This can’t be real. Think …… one step down from a Geyser.
Oh and did I mention we’re doing this on a really nice dining table?
There is one section of the Sentinel providing a buffer under my arm. Not enough.
My other roommate, an accountant, jumps to action. She is now acting Chief Nurse. Cleaning up puddles spilling over the table onto the floor, providing spare hands for gauze, tape, life support.
Okay, tube back on. Spewing blood issue resolved. Down a quart of my juices, puddles are now wiped up with images easily capable of causing permanent damage.
The paramedic is feeling terrible. There is now blood covering ALL of us.
Surprisingly, throughout the process I felt very little pain. It was confusing for my brain to take it all in. I mean, this thing should be KILLING me,right?
I decide to lighten the mood a little.
“I told you guys about my HIV, right?”
We burst out laughing. Okay, okay, insensitive joke, I know. But at the time, looking at everyone’s hands and forearms, it was all that would suffice.
Well, I woke up hydrated from the IV, and de-energized from the IV. I’d say at best I came out even.
Win some, lose some. Thats what friends are for.